URagaERi
by Ryujin Mei
Summary: The monster of Ikebukuro and the demon of that certain island. A human seen as a monster, yet possessed more humanity than them all. A monster removed from humanity; and wished to stay that way. The inside out reality her presence caused for a certain bartender. The twisted love song of Ikebukuro continues... (DRRR! SH spoilers)


**_Ok~ first, this is set during DRRR! SH so it's ..2 or so years after Vol 13. There will be seepoileers! (like a certain information broker being *mmmmph!*mouth gets covered*) and I'm going to reference other stuff in the Naritaverse (cos Ryohgo is the best best author of all!) see if you can find them? :P There are at least 3 in the prologue~_**

 **(Oh and 'Vorona's official English name is 'Varona' ...kinda loses the original meaning?)**

裏返り(uragaeri) means inside out or twisted!

* * *

 **A nameless artificial island, situated in a certain bridge between Sado and Niigata**

"No, my point is this. If you say you like small breasts, that doesn't mean you hate large breasts. Same goes for the opposite. Liking large breasts doesn't mean you dislike small breasts."

As if to emphasise this point, the young woman squeezed her bandaged hand in a cupping motion, much to the amusement of her male companions.

"It's simply a matter of preference. Like apples and oranges, Menthol lights, Kool Milds or Golden Bat," She waved her cigarette carelessly as she spoke, tracing the lines of motion with the wisps of smoke as she continued "Both the same but different, ugh, talking to you gives me a headach-mm?"

The extravagant sound of a cute ring tone grabbed her attention, stopping her sentence mid-way as she dug the tiny flip-phone from within her pants.

"...Papa?...Yeah I'm actually doing quite well over here...Huh, I knew you had a soft spot for your dearest daughter... You need my help?...Ah, Awakusu-kai needs MY help...Sure, I'll head home then."

She snapped the phone shut using her chin and shoved it back into her pocket, placing a hand on her hip as she rubbed her forehead with the other.

"Oh dear, looks like Papa's finally letting me come back home." mused the woman as she idly tapped the top of her phone onto her lower lip "What a shame, I was starting to get comfortable here."

"Heh? Someone like you has a place to call home eh?" grinned her male companion as he leant back in his chair and folded his hands under his head. "I would have thought the Demon of Etsusa belonged nowhere else but the shadows."

He laughed at his own attempt at a joke and shrugged his shoulders when she cast him a withering look. He was a tall middle-aged man with a series of tattoos and scars on his face. These contrasted sharply with the pale blue t-shirt emblazoned with 'I *heart* Me' and a pair of Hawaiian print shorts. "So, whereabouts this place you call home?"

The woman snickered and stretched her hands out leisurely as she jammed another cigarette into her mouth.

"It ain't Growerth or New York buddy, it's Ikebukuro."

 **An encounter with a certain bartender**

A tall blonde bartender with sunglasses who possessed great monstrous strength and threw vending machines like they were toys.

Within Ikebukuro, this would have dramatically reduced the number of suspects to a single person. Namely, Heiwajima Shizuo.

" _Naruhodo~_ I see now!," exclaimed the young boy who was balancing on the railing, a pair of military issued binoculars pressed against his eyes. "So is this Heiwajima guy a real human? Is he one of _them?_ _kowai!_ so scary!"

"You really didn't need to say the same thing in two different languages," stated the woman who was crouching on the ground. A laptop had been set up on an esky and numerous wires trailed dangerously around the ground. " Seba, hurry up and focus on scoping him out for me."

Seba lowered his binoculars so that they hung around his neck and flipped over, hooking his legs onto the railing and crossing his arms as he hung upside down. "Ein, you're such a bore."

"Hmph. Well you're a shit." The woman referred to as 'Ein' scrolled through multiple screens and then stopped at a particular one. A certain blonde bartender with sunglasses was in the process of getting his ass handed back to him by a group of high school students.

One of the young boys threw a can head on at Heiwajima, putting him off balance then throwing a punch. Ein and Seba watched on as the so-called 'Monster of Ikebukuro' began assuming a defensive stance and finally ran off, with a shorter man following close behind.

A black figure with a motorbike helmet quickly appeared on scene, stopping in front of Heiwajima then nodding its head before fleeing.

"*thmp* Ein slammed the laptop lid down quickly and grabbed a leather jacket hanging on the wall. "Target identified. We-no I have confirmed that the Headless Rider should be close to Heiwajima Shizuo's whereabouts. Seba, you stay here and gather intel while I head on out."

" _Ryoukai!_ Roger! _Wakarimashita!_ I understand! " responded Seba in a sing-song voice as he gracefully flipped over to the esky and gave Ein a sharp salute. " _Ganbatte!_ Good luck!"

"Shut up. _Uzendayo!"_

 **4 Hours later..**

"You...said...what?" Fine lines began to emerge on Heiwajima Shizuo's forehead, gradually increasing in size to form pronounced veins. Ones that threatened to burst at any moment and signified that the man was about to lose his cool.

The shorter man with dreadlocks pressed his hands together as if in prayer and lowered his head,

".? I simply said the Headless Rider must be quite evil if it's behind the mass disappearance."

What happened next was what everyone, bar (or Ein as she had introduced herself) expected. The woman stood where she was, watching curiously as the enraged man's forehead became dotted with angry marks and the sounds of veins popping were practically audible.

Most bystanders began to flee to a safer area, others began taking out their phones and began recording (Title: Shizuo strikes again! A new challenger this time? Views: 193,650) Others ignored it since this was a fairly common occurrence.

"...Hmmm."

Normally, when confronted with the sight of an immensely angry man single handedly uprooting a vending machine and carrying it above his head to throw at you, any ordinary person would be able to read the signs and understand 'ah, this guy is dangerous. I need to escape."

Asuki Kuina was an exception. Those 4 years living among the twisted criminals of _that_ bridge had sapped away what little humanity she had left. Perhaps the same could be said for her common sense, though that isn't relevant at the moment.

"Fuck you...What the hell do you know about Celty... EH?" growled the man as he stomped closer to her, steam practically pouring from his ears as more and more angry marks appears on his face.

"Ah. I see. The rumours were true," smiled the woman as she cracked her neck casually and pulled off her leather jacket. "You're a loyal friend to the Headless Rider. Wonderful."

The shiny black material glinted in the mid-afternoon sunlight, lighting reflecting off the sliver metal decorations on the jacket as she raised it up high.

"Let's see who's better, the Yokai of Etsusa or the 'Monster of Ikebukuro',mmm?" chuckled Kuina as she tossed the jacket up high with a dramatic flick of her wrist. Everyone's attention was drawn to her jacket as she took that moment to increase weight on her left foot, using that force as a boost and torpedoing forward.

Shizuo paused mid-throw and glared at her, his cigarette wagging in his mouth as he growled out a 'HUH?" of confusion. In that same moment, the park bench left his hands, though nobody paid any attention to it (apart from the people in its line of destruction, who fled to safety).

The woman had seemingly disappeared. Her leather jacket was falling slowly through the air from when she had thrown it.

Time seemed to slow to a crawl as the bench in Shizuo's hands tumbled through the air. The moment the bench finally landed, smashing through a vending machine, something unexpected happened.

"*thuk*"

A sound like somebody smacking a wooden hammer against a steel door was heard as the woman reappeared. Her fisted arm partially buried in Shizuo's stomach as she moved to land another blow.

"—hey! That hurt! What's YOUR GODDAM PROBLEM?" shouted Shizuo with surprise as his cigarette fell from his mouth. This woman was fast! not to mention strong, she was quite possibly of a higher calibre than some others he had faced, such as Varona. Her next blow hit his face, he felt nothing until a stream of liquid dribbled down his neck and made a grab for her incoming arm. She dodged, flipping onto her hands and throwing a kick at his chest.

"I don't have a problem WITH you, per se. I'm simply doing my job," she leapt gracefully down from the dumpster she had jumped on and bent her arm around her neck, moving it swiftly to deliver a chop to his neck.

"STOP BOTHERING ME!"

A vending machine was torn brutally from its place next to the restaurant front and before she could say anything, was hurtling towards the woman known as Ein in some circles, and known as Asuki Kuina to others.

"..w-wh-kyaaaa!" She managed to scream with shock as the machine made contact, then flew through the air, landing at least 400m away from the two and falling unceremoniously onto the pavement like a sack of potatoes.

The crowd of onlookers began to disperse, gleefully discussing what had just happened in the space of 15 minutes and taking pictures of the out cold woman.

 **~x~x~x~**

"*sigh* Just when I thought things had gotten back to normal again..." sighed Tom as he knelt down and tapped the side of the woman's face gently. She didn't respond.

"Well, looks like things will never be calm for someone like you-

Shizuo shot him a murderous look. "Heh? What do you mean Tom-san?" He flicked the lighter and jammed a fresh cigarette in his mouth, shoving the lighter back into his chest pocket. Cursing to himself, he rubbed his bruised cheek tenderly with his hand, his hand came back tinged with blood from a fresh gash on his cheek.

"Er..I...nothing, don't worry about it," said Tom with nervousness as he breathed a sigh of relief. From members of the Russian mafia, the yakuza, a strange foreigner wearing a mask to twisted people like that certain information broker; it seemed there would always be someone after Shizuo. Hmm, come to think of it, lately there were high schoolers trying to pick a fight with him, and now, this strange woman.

"Well, it's not very nice to leave a young woman out cold in a place like this," said Tom as he glanced up at Shizuo "Should we take her to the hospital or a police box? ah, maybe not the latter since it might not look very good for you-huh?"

Without any effort, almost as if she was a sack of rice, Shizuo hefted the unconscious woman onto his shoulder and began walking towards a certain destination. Namely, the one friend who he would always call upon when things like this happened.

Tom simply stood up with a resigned look on his face as the woman's blissful sleeping face stared back at him from Shizuo's back.

 **Within the head office of a certain Yakuza organisation**

"What do you mean the head of Asuki-kai is missing."

it was more of a statement than a question when it came from Shiki's mouth.

The underling standing in front of him began quaking in his shoes as he pointed tearfully to the leather jacket lying on the table. "F-forgive me! The head instructed us to meet at the Warehouse near the docks...but...Forgive me!" he pressed himself to the ground and began slamming his forehead against the ground.

"Aniki! I swear on my life I'll find them and bring them back here safely!"

Shiki raised an eyebrow and proceeded to physically berate his underling while Seba looked on with a bored look on his face.

" _Yappari..._ I knew that..."

 **Ramblings of an underground doctor**

Ah, I don't want to be involved in another one of Shizuo's messes... but Celty would be angry if I didn't help her out. Well, I might turn out to be as lucky as when I accepted Kasuka-kun's request and got to meet Ruri-sorry, sorry I'm getting off track again.

Hmm? This woman looks familiar though...I feel like I've seen her somewhere before.

...What's that sound? Isn't it Ruri-chan's newest single? hu-wha? Tom-san! it's her phone!

Her phones ringing? You answer it Shizuo-gyaaahh!

Oh, sorry! sorry! I thought you were going to bash my head in with that! Yikes! oh right, right I'll answer it. Calm down Shizuo.

 _*click* Moshi moshi- Ah, sorry, I found the owner of this phone knocked out and brought her ho-ahahaha! ha...ha...ha...please calm down. I would never do something to compromise a woman's safety! I am already in a steady relationship with someone at the moment. Ah?_

 _W-wait a minute...i-is that you? Shiki-san?_

 _...Yes. This is Kishitani Shinra. No, someone brought Kuina-san just moments ago and asked me to take care of her. ...eh? no way! she fell down...at the station.._ (Shinra peeked at Shizuo who shot him a murderous glare and winced)

 _N-no nothing at all! Yes, Kuina-san should be fine, just a few broken bones and maybe some temporal memory loss bu-_ (Shinra glanced nervously at Tom who shrugged apologetically) _ah perhaps you should come over and we can talk then... Alright. See you._

 **~X~X~X~**

"Shizuo!" screeched Shinra as Shizuo looked back at him with confusion

"What did you do to this poor girl? "

Shizuo frowned with confusion while Tom face palmed again.

"...I'm hungry." An out of place female voice interrupted their conversation (out of place since barely any females came here and Celty couldn't speak). Three pairs of eyes (and a motorbike helmet) turned to face the woman who was slowly sitting up, an annoyed expression on her face as she folded her arms.

"Ah, she's awake now!" Shinra was the first to react, shuffling over to her and smiling professionally , "Kuina-san, how are you feeling?"

"Kuina? What a weird name, I don't know any Kuinas" said the woman who was named Kuina. She yawned loudly and looked around the room slowly. She was surrounded by strangers in a comfortable looking apartment, judging from the dark hue of the window, it was around night-time, perhaps 10pm or later.

"Ah, so...who am I again? What am I doing here?" She held her head momentarily and groaned "...I feel like I've fallen into some clichéd scenario. Did you bring the udon noodles for the party?"

* * *

 **Ikebukuro BBS**

Ne, did you see it?

See what?

There IS someone who can stand up to Heiwajima Shizuo in a fight.

Seriously? That guy's a monster!

Speaking of him, what happened to that guy? His rival or something?

Eh? you mean Orihara Izaya? www, he's gone from Ikebukuro now. I reckon Shizuo killed him during the fight last time.

Mmm, I don't know about that. Though I'm sure we won't be seeing him anytime soon.

GUYS! GUYS! it happened again!

Hehh? what now? that crazy bartender fighting again?

No, the Headless Rider's kidnapped another person again!

EH? Seriously? Not again..

Yeah it's now the 70th person to go missing!

Hey, I heard from a very reliable sauce that the Medei group got some members taken as well. Apparently they're sending in some big guns from Asuki-kai to help out.

Creepy! Things are going to get so crazy around here it's not funny.


End file.
